10 Things I'm Thankful for in '08

10. Time at home with my family, both immediate and extended. Who else's family will play "Pit" while shouting "two for two, two for two!!!" for hours of laughter?! And I can't imagine anyone else I'd rather stuff myself to the brim with swedish pancakes than my grandparents and aunt and uncle!
9. Two Thanksgiving meals in one day with the Meyers and the Howard families. Eating until I am uncomfortably full is awesome although I did feel guilty at times since I know somewhere, someone was hungry.
8. A job. Being laid-off in january for four months was tough, but thankfully I am back where I belong at The Citadel. God works in mysterious ways!
7. My own home. I became a new homeowner in January and love having a place of my own.
6. Amazing friends! I'm constantly convinced that I have the most amazing friends that serve as my family in SC.
5. My sweet dog Wrigley aka "Piggy".
4. RHG. What other boyfriend would be willing to forgoe his own Thanksgiving with his family to play cards, go shopping on Black Friday, and gain 10 pounds with mine?
3. My Nicaraguan expierence in '08. I embarked on my first mission trip this year after a few years of waiting and am forever thankful for the trip, people, teammates, and leaders that the Lord placed me with. It is beacuase of this trip that I cannot wait to serve on a lifetime full of mission trips.
2. A home to escape home from. Although Charleston is my home now, I am so thankful for my parent's home in Rockford to escape too when I need rest for my weary spirit. I love my life, don't get me wrong, but I think we all need down time to restore and rejuvinate and my folks have always provided that for me.
1. HOPE and FAITH. 2008 was tough at times with lay-offs and financial trials, but hope has never left my side thanks to faith and my amazing God. I've had some hopeless times in my life, but in 2008 Hope always rose to the top. And for that I am THANKFUL.

A night with TWLOHA

Some of you have probably seen me sport my favorite t-shirts with the wording "To Write Love on Her Arms" and wondered what exactly that meant. Others of you know exactly what that means and how much those 6 words mean to me. Thanks to my wonderfully supportive boyfriend, this Tuesday night I was lucky enough to spend the night captivated by the girl in which To Write Love on Her Arms was created about. Listening to Renee Yohe speak was something that I will never forget and was something that I am so thankful for.

I first stumbled upon TWLOHA a year or two ago thanks to a random MTV series. No one on the series spoke about the organization, no one plugged the cause, just a simple couple wearing cool t-shirts led me to the group who in part led me to the truth which I claim today. TWLOHA is a non-profit, christian organization who's sole purpose is to educate and bring awareness to such topics of depression, anxiety, and suicide. For decades depression has plagued not only the United States, but also people around the world. Check out these statistics:

-121 million people worldwide suffer from depression. (The World Health Organization)

-18 million of these cases are happening in the United States. (The National Institute of Mental Health)

-Between 20% and 50% of children and teens struggling with depression have a family history of this struggle and the offspring of depressed parents are more than three times as likely to suffer from depression. (U.S. Surgeon General's Survey, 1999)

-Depression often co-occurs with anxiety disorders and substance abuse, with 30 percent of teens with depression also developing a substance abuse problem. (NIMH)

-2/3 of those suffering from depression never seek treatment.

Untreated depression is the number one cause of suicide, and suicide is the third leading cause of death among teenagers. (NIMH)

TWLOHA has brought light to what most people push into the dark. They've given victims a voice and they've taught me that although I have struggled with depression, I am not alone and that it's nothing that I need to be ashamed of. Shame keeps depression and anxiety in the dark and we all know that what we keep in the dark and ignore, most often times grows and becomes larger. I, for one, do not want my illness to grow nor did I do anything to bring this about. It's an illness just like cancer, just like migraines, just like anything else that you go to the doctor for and seek treatment.

When I stumbled upon this group I was of the mindset that if I prayed hard enough, I could be healed. I also thought that if God really was who He says He is than He would cure me of this illness. I started praying and relying on prayer alone for my escape. I was struggling and had sought treatment however at I had felt guilty for not trying to heal on my own and relying on doctors for help. Although prayer and the Lord's help are large factors in the treatment of such illnesses, they do not need to be the only solution. God created people. Some people he created to become doctors. Those doctors have gone on to find treatments for such illnesses and TWLOHA has helped me realize that just maybe those treatments they've found in counseling, medications, etc...are God's form of rescue for us. Maybe the people He has placed in my life are also part of His rescue, as they often remind me of hope when my own head cannot seem to remember.

Not only has TWLOHA hes helped me realize that rescue is possible and that treatment exists for my own well being, they've created a community of people who share my feelings and sometimes my pain. They have given us a voice and done it in a way that glorifies God and His triumphs as we start to heal. If I am going to be called to go through the darker times throughout my life, I want to also be a voice to others when needed and hand to hold when they too feel as I have.

Although I could write for days on this topic that is so close to my heart, I will not bore anyone any longer than needed. However I do ask that you read this last piece and if you feel so inclined, please check out TWLOHA.com to read the full story about Renee, the movement, and how to help those who might need you to "understand" some day. The story is incredibly well written and just like Renee herself, is captivating.

I leave you with this excerpt from their story which beautifully states "We often ask God to show up. We pray prayers of rescue. Perhaps God would ask us to be that rescue, to be His body, to move for things that matter. He is not invisible when we come alive. I might be simple but more and more, I believe God works in love, speaks in love, is revealed in our love. I have seen that this week and honestly, it has been simple: Take a broken girl, treat her like a princess, Tell her something true when all she's known are lies. Tell her God loves her. Tell her about forgiveness, the possibility of freedom, tell her she was made to dance in white dresses. All these things are true.

We are only asked to love, to offer hope to the many hopeless. We don't get to choose all the endings, but we are asked to play the rescuers. We won't solve all mysteries and our hearts will certainly break in such a vulnerable life, but it is the best way. We were made to be lovers bold in broken places, pouring ourselves out again and again until we're called home.

Great Things Are Yet to Come

With economic hardships surrounding all of us, regardless of our city, our job title, and our socio-economic status, I cannot help but turn to God for guidance, peace, and strength. With local food banks not having enough food to feed families who have lost work and with families that are fortunate enough to still have work feeling stretched due to rising prices and living costs, I go to bed nightly praying that things do no get worse.

This Wednesday I will attend the 7th Annual Charleston Leadership breakfast with 9 other members of our staff at The Citadel Foundation. I am so excited to be seated with 9 Christians from my office who are all there for the same reason...to lift our city up in prayer. Aside from our table of ten, hundreds of Charleston community members will have one focus that morning, regardless of home church, denomination, and personal prayer requests. WE will be together lifting up this City, OUR city, to the Lord who holds us in His hands and I cannot help but to believe that there are greater things yet to come, and greater things still to be done in this city.

Hotel Rwanda

Last night was the first night in a while that I could actually cuddle up on the couch after a home cooked meal and finally watch the movie I've had for over a week now. Since it's debut last year, I've been intrigued by the movie Hotel Rwanda. I have put off seeing it however due to the graphic scenes that I knew I'd see and just the overall tone that I knew it would cast upon my heart and mind. Without any further delays or procrastination, I sat down last night with a blanket, pillow, and Rob and started the movie.

Starting the movie was simple, watching the movie was not. I wish I could say that I watched the whole thing but that would be a lie. I'd guess I lasted about an hour, maybe even less. I couldn't sit on the couch comfortably wrapped in a blanket and watch people lose their lives by machete. There was one scene where the Hutu's had about 10 Tutsies gathered on the side of the road awaiting to be killed one by one right in front of each other. What made me literally nauseous was that while the Hutu's waved their guns and machetes over their head with wide grins and excited eyes, the camera focused in on one of the Tutsi men, quietly sitting with his head in his hands and you could see the complete emptiness in his soul. I could see the desperation of their situation and I could not fathom having my mother seated to my right, possibly sheltering a small child under her legs for protection, and knowing that I would die, we would die, and we were all going to have to watch it happen. No human being should ever have to witness such acts, however this is the reality of many.

I wanted to keep watching out of respect for their situation but I just couldn't do it and I am disappointed in myself. I need to watch that stuff and I need to be educated on the reality of such places and I failed. I shielded my eyes and I turned my back. One of the most powerful lines in the movie comes from an interaction with an American reporter and the main character (a native from Africa in the movie). When the war has broken out and the massacre is surrounding their hotel, the African says to reporter "thank you for filming the killings as it will allow people to see what is going on here and they'll intervene." The American reporter replies without any feeling or remorse "In all honesty, no one is going to intervene. People will see this on the news and then they'll go back to their dinners and to their lives." (Insert the sound of my stomach hitting the floor here.)

As we turned off the movie not even half way through, I looked at Rob and asked "what do we do?" I want to do something. Delivering medical supplies is no longer enough to me, but what can I do? I am a 29 year old, white female with no military experience and nothing to contribute to such genocides, but I cannot be one of those people who will see such slaughtering and turn back to my dinner and back to my life. I am heartsick over this and I cannot just turn off my "I care" button. And I can't help but wonder what if we all cared?

Worth sharing...

http://shawnsblogspot.wordpress.com/2008/10/20/i-am-not-a-mistake-i-am-a-one-issue-man/

NKOTB

This past weekend 5 girls from SC, DC, and Texas embarked on a Girl's Weekend to Chicago for some much needed "girly" time and a little light hearted fun. Staying on the Magnificent Mile in downtown Chicago with 4 of your girlfriends is kind of like letting a sugar-deprived 6 year old loose in Wonka World. The sights of shiny store windows, the smell of coffee and corner bakeries, and the hustle and bustle of the fast paced Chicago lifestyle can be pretty overwhelming! Luckily for my bank account, my recent trip to a third world country helped put the shopping spree that lay in front of me into perspective (although I slipped up in Forever 21).

With shopping, amazing food, and lots of laughter in toe, we headed out on Saturday night for the main event...the New Kids on the Block Reunion Tour! Holla at your girl! Although what started off as a fun night to laugh about and be somewhat embarrassed about, turned into 2 of the most exciting hours of my life (sad but true)! NKOTB is back ladies and gents and I don't care who knows that I am a fan!

These boys sang and danced, possibly even better than they did in their prime, for over two hours straight. What that meant for their committed, faithful, adoring fans is that we sang, screamed and jumped up and down for over two hours straight. As a light show kicked off the concert and began to spell out the letters NKOTB (see photo above) I was instantly back in the sixth grade. When they started to arise out of the floor in the opening moments, I thought my heart was going to burst and I am pretty sure my vocal cords nearly did just that. I was young again and I was in love again with Joey and Donnie. Bald or not, Donnie still rocks and Joey still has the best hair ever. Period.

Thanks NKOTB for letting 6 girls (we picked up a 6th friend for the night thanks to a Craigslist posting we posted) feel young again. You gave us a chance to forget about everything life has taught us over the last 17 or so years and for one night we got to be little girls again without a care in the world, with smiles plastered all over our faces, with tears streaming down cheeks (Tracy and Mary;), and you let us through "coolness" right out the windows of the Allstate Arena. You're still hot, you can still sing, and 4 out of 5 of you still have full head's of hair. Rock on NKOTB!!!!

Me, working out??? What next, World peace?

That's right folks, Brittany Meyers has offically started working out again! After taking a "work-out" hiatus for the last 7 years, I've finally turned over a new leaf. The craziest part is that I actually love it! My body actually craves more of it and this week, having a stomach bug and not being able to go to the gym after work has felt pretty lame:(

I'm trying to recruit a local trainer to host a "boot camp" session once a week for Citadel employees on campus during our lunch hour. If you have any connections, shoot me a comment.

If a bootcamp happens plus my weekly sessions, there will be no excuse to not have a "Gun show" during '09's beach season.

Why?

At The Citadel there is a section in the cadet's newspaper entitled "The Why Column". The Whys are always my favorite to read and it is the first section I've flipped to over my 10 year relationship with this great institution. As I am exhaustively sitting in my cubicle after working all weekend, I figured I'd send out my own "whys" today.

Why do I have to work all weekend, yet I do not receive comp time like our Assistant does? I do not make what a Director makes however when it comes to comp time all of a sudden I am granted Director status and must be back at work Monday morning?

Why does no one in my office communicate with each other?
Why did we have 4 hours of our Annual Staff Retreat designated to better communication practices and still no one communicates?
Why am I covering two positions now and being paid for one?
Why do I wish I was in 100 degree weather, dripping with sweat in Nicaragua, as opposed to sitting on my cushioned chair in our air conditioned office?

Simple Moments=Wonderful Memories

Playing with 70's and 80's glasses can be FUN! Too bad someone really had to wear those home.






Who knew laying in the grass, under the Nicaraguan sky with new girlfriends could be so much fun and an awesome way to close out another great day at the clinic?!









Warning: Drinking from your water bottle on Ariel's bus, do not try this at home kids!









Save the Pollo Campaign's Inaugural team meeting and Board Member photo.











I've never been more excited to eat Papa John's in my entire life! Simple pleasures in life are the best!

No more, No less.

No more, no less. That is where I am at in my life right now and let me tell you, it feels pretty darn good.

I am totally content (or satisfied depending on who you ask) and I really "want" for nothing right now. I have found something over the last few months both in myself and outside of myself that has completely changed my world for the better. I feel as though I have won some sort of sweepstakes that I didn't even know I entered. I can take deep breathes, I can stop second guessing, and I can rest easily in the fact that I never was in control and that's exactly how it was supposed to be.

Short story short, my life is amazing. No more, no less.