Friday, August 9, 2013

Child of the 80's

I'm 100% a child of the 80's. I love its music, its over the top colors and layering of slouch socks. I do not, however, miss its crunchy hair, mall bangs, and having to spend 15 minutes of my day, every day, re-tight rolling my jeans.

I'm sure many of you have already  seen the article going around on Facebook on the "53 Things Only 80's Girls Can Understand , but if you had not yet taken 5 minutes out of your day for a little rainbow, glitter, and scratch and sniff walk down memory lane, I thought I'd give you the opportunity. If you were lucky enough to experience the 80's, clicking on the link above will give you a good chuckle as you nod your head to all it's ridiculousness.

And to make this a little more personal, here are just a few quick stories about my 80s ridiculousness:

  • I became one of the first, proud owners of a Pound Puppy in our cul-du-sac, which I spun into a story on how we had just gotten a new puppy. A real puppy mind you. Now if you remember Pound Puppies, they look nothing like a real dog. Not in the least. Well, being the creative and bossy gal that I was, I made all of our cul-du-sac friends "view" our new puppy from the curb, as I revealed him through our front, picture window for probably 30 seconds and then quickly scooted him out of said window on account of him being "shy". What a twerp? Sadly, some of the kids believed me and were jealous of our new "dog". Apparently, we were all gullible twerps on our block.

  • Jem was my jam. I wanted to be Jem so badly. And being the kid on the block who always choreographed plays, dances and backyard circuses and made my friends dress up, I OF COURSE had to host a Jem play. Duh. So we dressed up like the Holograms, made up our dances and rallied a few of the moms and the elderly couple from the across the street and charged them $.25 to view our shenanigans. Where things went horribly wrong was the fact that I came down with major stage fright and refused to go "on stage" aka our back patio. I can remember crying behind the garage because I didn't want to sing but I also didn't want to return the $1.50 that we just made. Alas, my mom made me give everyone their money back and I hung my crimped head in shame. I knew then that being a fake rock star like Jem was way hard and decided to stick with Barbie. She was a lot less threatening.

  • If you don't still love NKOTB, pink boom boxes, Caboodles, plastic charm necklaces and jelly bracelets, we can't be friends. Sorry. Non-negotiable.

  • I'd like you to meet our 3rd Cabbage Patch Kid with its janky, blond haircut. One day my brother and I were watching TV and the doorbell rings. We run to the door to see which one of our friends would be asking to play, yet there's no one there. Until we look down. Insert a naked Cabbage Patch baby with a bad, homemade haircut lying on our welcome mat. We were awestruck! Someone had abandoned their "child" and had chosen us to adopt her. They must have really trusted us, we thought. Only a child of the 80's would find a forfeited, naked Cabbage Patch kid on their doorstep and think it an honor and not a creepy threat. 

  • I'm just going to say it. My parents never bought me a Popple. Still makes me kind of sad. All of my friends had Popples. AND the Barbie Mansion. Not me. BUT, what I did have and had forgotten all about it until I read the article was Pootchie stationary. I loved my Pootchie! What was not to love about a plastic dog with hot pink fuzzy ears who stamped your paper?? Do they even make toys this cool anymore? I highly doubt it. 80's toys were straight up Rad. Bring back Pootchie, Bring back Pootchie!
Anyone want to swap some Lisa Frank stickers for our Trapper Keepers before school starts?!

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