If Budweiser Made a Commercial About My Office

"Today we support you, Mrs. Office Break Room Interior Designer. Without your commitment to "improving" our lunch room atmosphere, we might still be sitting in that tiny room on lower, more comfortable chairs that made a lot less noise when you sat down. Whether it's the painting you pulled out of your yard sale pile, or the new baking tower with zero storage, we tip our hats and staplers to you for taking an ugly room and making it hideous. Should you rest and stop ordering non-matching and impractical furniture and actually do your job? No way. Somewhere there's gotta be just one more cabinet that you could squeeze into that 9 by 9 room. We know you won't stop until none of us can fit in there and we all have to eat in the library where our coworkers knit. So keep spending our money and pushing us further into the lobby and we'll keep raising our glass to you, Mrs. Office Break Room Interior Designer!"